This is the face I make at work. It's the face of a team player who wants the ball and knows that "the ball" is a metaphor for a business thing. My expression is conveying that I can handle anything you throw at me with a weird smile on my face. Not the kind of weird smile that says "I'm here to goof around" but the kind that says "I'm here to work hard, then blow off a little steam with my weird mouth."
expression – выражение (лица, глаз и т. п.)
to convey – передавать (звук, запах, информацию, впечатления)
to handle – справляться, обращаться с чем-то
to goof around – бездельничать, дурачиться
After you hire me, I'm going to be looking at you like this a lot. In a good way. So I've captured this expression in my profile pic to help you imagine that you're already having a conversation with me. Like you just said, "Hey." And I just said, "Hey." Then you said, "Can you stop staring at me like that, please?" And I said, "Like what?" Then you said, "Like that." And I said, "Like, confidently?" Then you said, "Please just let me pee."
in a good way – в хорошем смысле
to stare – пялиться
confidently – уверенно
I made the decision to expose my teeth in this photo so you can see that I'm the type of person who doesn't hide things in his mouth. No Ping-Pong balls or trick handkerchiefs. After all, you aren't hiring me for my magic tricks, right? Right?
to expose – выставлять напоказ, демонстрировать
handkerchief – носовой платок
One of my eyebrows is raised in the photo to show that I'm inquisitive. The other one is just regular, to show that I'm also not inquisitive. There are many facets to me.
inquisitive – любознательный, любопытный
facets – грани
My head is facing forward, while the rest of me is turned to the side. This is my body's natural position when I'm at work. It's playful, yet awkward, yet very awkward. It also offers a glimpse into how efficient I am even when I'm on the clock. Imagine that you've just stopped me while I'm on my way to a meeting, and I turn toward you, but only with the body parts I need for talking.
awkward – нелепый, неловкий
glimpse – быстрый взгляд
efficient – эффективный
to be on the clock – мало времени, время тикает
My arms are folded to demonstrate that I get things done, and then celebrate by folding my arms. In this particular case, I got this photo done, which took, like, a year. Of course, I'll unfold my arms as needed for explosive fist bumps in the hallway and even for nonexplosive ones.
particular – конкретный; определённый
fist bump – приветствие «кулак о кулак»
My shoulders are positioned in a way that says, "I'm ready to use my shoulders in this job if I have to." Maybe you can't imagine a scenario in which you'll need my shoulders. That's what my last employer said, too, until the day my shoulders were giving you-know-who a boost up to the supply-closet heating duct where he'd stashed a gram of you-know-what to snort into his you-know-where. So never say never.
to stash – припрятать, заныкать
to snort – втягивать носом (наркотик)
My legs aren't included in this photo because their potential contribution pales in comparison with what my torso brings to the table.
to pale – бледнеть; тускнеть
to bring to the table – приносить пользу
I didn't want you to be distracted by a busy background, so I blurred it out. In real-life workplace environments, I have zero problems standing out against all sorts of backgrounds, even aquariums.
to blur – размывать изображение, делать нечётким
I chose this shirt to show you that I wear this shirt a lot. It has a collar with a space for a necktie right in the middle, meaning that, at any moment, I could dial up the business intensity in a major way and start doing so many work-related things that you won't know what hit you. For example, I might spearhead something out of nowhere, then turn around and start facilitating something else, then go ahead and implement both of those things on top of what I already did to them.
collar – воротник
to spearhead – быть инициатором
to facilitate – способствовать, содействовать
I'm currently working on a résumé as a complement to this photo. When you see it, I think you'll realize pretty quickly that there are so many businessy things that I do so good. And if you play your cards right I can stare at you while I do them.
to play one's cards right – правильно разыграть свою карту, использовать свои возможности
1. My expression ................... (to convey) that I can handle anything you throw at me with a weird smile on my face.
2. Can you stop ................... (to stare) at me like that, please?
3. After all, you ................... (not to hire) me for my magic tricks, right?
4. It also offers a glimpse into how efficient I am even when I ................... (to be on the clock).
5. My legs aren't included in this photo because their potential contribution ................... (to pale) in comparison with what my torso ................... (to bring to the table).
1. My expression is conveying that I can handle anything you throw at me with a weird smile on my face.
2. Can you stop staring at me like that, please?
3. After all, you aren't hiring me for my magic tricks, right?
4. It also offers a glimpse into how efficient I am even when I'm on the clock.
5. My legs aren't included in this photo because their potential contribution pales in comparison with what my torso brings to the table.